its been a while since ive been back on blogger....i realized that im horrible with blogging as I was horrible with my diary when I was younger...Ive been super busy with work and trying to get my paperwork together for London....its been a tremendously long and tedious process and Im not even sure I see the end to the tunnel yet but Im hoping it comes sooner than later....because im not a patient person to begin with and its driving me nuts not knowing when we'll be able to go....

I found out something today and its given me a surprising sense of closure to something that has been at the back of my mind for a while....im surprised to feel the way i do about it....its a sense of relief and calmness....

i saw this show on tv yesterday and was kind of intrigued by it....its a decent show....for the last year, Jessica Simpson has been constantly criticized about her weight and it was nice to see her not phased by it....its refreshing since our society is always surrounded by such negative images of beauty....the show follows her around the world, where she searches for the definition of beauty to each of the cultures and to show how different the meaning of beauty can be to everyone....it truly illustrates that beauty is in the eye of the beholder....

Inception

Recently saw Inception the other day, and i must say that movie does live up to the hype...the concept for the movie was so genius...its amazing how much thought and detail was put into the script...the movie does make you think and question our "reality"......i assume most people like myself has never really questioned our reality and its existence....this movie made me think and reminded me of philosophy back in high school when we watched the Matrix....i have always been fascinated by dreams and the concept of experiencing this pseudo reality because everything seems so real, that is until you wake up...whos to say that our reality now is not an elaborate dream....wouldnt that be interesting....

The Notebook

Recently watched the Notebook again, ive forgotten how sweet that story was......the movie brings back the topic of What IFs...the only reason why Rachel McAdam's character went back to see Ryan Gosling is to figure out that "what if" factor...what if we were all given a second chance with someone from the past...what would you do? would you risk everything you may have now for something uncertain?....is it worth it? or is it just better to let the past be the past?...who knows but the story would have never happened if she never took the risk to explore that second chance..

Happy Canada Day!!

its our birthday and guess whos here to visit....
so its July 1st, its CAnada Day! YAY!! and in my world...its also newbie day...July 1 of every year marks the start of a new residency year....which also means that i would avoid teaching hospitals with a 10 foot pole for the summer if possible....ive actually managed to avoid working this day for 2 years...but i was stuck working today and it is actually not as bad as i had anticipated....and thank goodness for the online system, i think it rejects retard orders....cuz i remember how often we used to get those during the summer months....makes life easier for everyone......finally done my rotation of shifts for a while and its time to play for the long weekend....wedding tomorrow and the its PRIDE DAY on sunday!...ive always wanted to go to the parade but have always had to work....i finally get this weekend off to go...im so excited!

its finally OVER!

So the G20 Summit is finally over and done with...but apparently people arent through with their protesting yet...its still going on downtown....
i worked the G20 summit weekend and it got a little crazy...who knew people could get so crazy....what started off as peaceful protests turned into mini riots....WTF?!?....it was a mad mess downtown with stores being broken into and police cars being torched....which leads to all the core downtown hospitals being on lock down....there was a blockade of police blocking off protestors from getting onto the street of hospitals....it was pretty crazy but kinda cool stuff....nonetheless, im a little ashamed and appalled that people were as disruptive and psychotic as they were over the weekend....i understand the whole protesting thing, but the rioting...that was uncalled for and stupid...at the end of the day...those crazy mofos ruined it for everyone, they were not protesting for a cause, and they made all the other peaceful protestors look bad....all in all it was one big mess....staying downtown over the weekend was an experience in itself....constant helicopters circling the downtown core...i could hear it over my ipod....and massive groups of police at corners is an interesting sight...but im glad its done and after all of it....was it worth the 1.1 billion dollars?....o gad... hELL NO...can these people not just meet on an online net meeting?!...save everyone the hassle and security issues?

not to mention, it was a bitch and a half to get home after it was all done...a crazy thunderstorm flooded streets and protestors blocked major intersections....after 2 days of craziness, i just wanted to go home....

Goodbye G20, i hope you never come back again, and to my stupid government...thanks for wasting my tax dollars!

G20 booo

Its 3 days before the G20 summit lands in Toronto....and the city looks freaking scary....driving to work yesterday was an interesting experience....we have freakin 10 ft high fences...yes fences up all over the downtown core filled with swat looking cops at every freakin intersection....it looks like we lived in District 9......with major road blocks in the core of the city....its a hell of a mess....this G20 business is quite frankly just annoying ...and the genius that decided to bring it to the core of downtown is a absolute moron...I understand that the meeting is necessary and all that but is it really necessary to bring all that security and maddness to downtown Toronto??.....as if traffic on a day to day basis isnt hell enough...lets bring 20 of the biggest world's leaders to downtown so we can shut down our financial district .....and to top it..the geniuses decided to build a man made lake in the middle of downtown....their reasoning behind this is to provide a place for the world leaders to experience Canadian cottage country...WTF?!?...you're kidding me right?...the real lake is like 5 mins away...and if u want to experience cottage country then move the G20 up north to where you're holding the G8...away from the city....its ridiculous how a man made lake is considered more important than investing our tax dollars into health care or something else more relevant....thanks Canadian government...another example of how you waste our tax dollars.....and what the hell are we going to do with this lake afterwards?....so stupid....and i have to work those 2 days ....great....the hospitals are right in between the areas of expected protests...even better....

on the brighter side...its FIFA TIME!!...i love the world cup...every 4 years we finally get to watch quality soccer in North America....and soccer players are definitely the best looking athletes....no wonder its the most beautiful sport in the world.....Im hoping Spain and Portugal will pull through....





how can you NOT like soccer....just Rinaldo and Torres alone is reason enough...

Wheres the sun at?

its a crappy gloomy day, its been a cooler week this week, all rainy and crappy....im not a fan....i need some sunlight...i'd like to sit outside in the sun and eat my damn cotton candy ice cream.....today is the first of my 2 weeks off....sweet...its been a couple of shitty days at work....glad im not back for a bit...just have some committee stuff to deal with next week....



so mtv has a new show out....Downtown girls...the concept...i think they're trying to ride off the sex and the city wave, its basically "real life" sex and the city.....watched the first epsidoe today...it seems somewhat entertaining...theme for the episode...recycling exes? interesting concept...honestly its pretty apparent that its doomed from the beginning of the episode...the girls decide to throw a party, invite all their exes and perhaps trade exes?...um...personally...even though exes are exes for a reason, im not sure id want my best friends to be dating them...or better yet...witnessing them making out with one....so thats exactly what happens in the episode...and surprise surprise, jealousy is in the air.....but really...did they really expect this to work out? would you really want to see your ex walk down the aisle with your best friend?....thats just weird....and the party also resulted in the girls wanting their exes back....not surprising at all either...now that just starts whole other problem...

i dont know why but im a sucker for mtv shows....i think ive watched almost all the brain cell killing shows on mtv...its like my guilty pleasure....i love them....this might be another one that will make it on my list....which reminds me...i have yet to see the new sex and the city 2 movie....

Officially Done!!

So its official, i attended my convocation yesterday and it all comes to a lovely end....another 2 years of school done and now what??.....ive been getting that question for the last year..."so what are u going to do with your life now??" ....good question...i have no clue...but i think im going to take some time off to figure it out...im not sure why everyone expects you to have your life planned out all the time....everyone expects me to find an APN job now and thats it....no...thats not my plan...i finally have time to myself now, ive spent the last 20 years of my life in school and being responsible...i think its only fair that now its MY time...for once to step out of the box and do what I really want...not whats expected of me....

As for my convocation....so glad it didnt rain but the field in the court was all muddy and gross from the rain the night before....it was a long ass ceremony and we were the last program to be presented with our degrees but it was great because we are finally done.....

booked for vacation in August...YAY!! ive realized i cant stay here for more than a few months without wanting to go on vacation....too long....im starting to think i work to travel....i think i can be content not ever owning property but traveling every chance i get instead....seems like a good trade off to me

week off

its been a hectic month of May....ive been working alot in the past month...probably more than ive worked since school started....
so theres 2 days left until my convocation...its a weird feeling...2 years of school has gone by soo quickly and im going to be officially done .....
another chapter completed and its time to move on...finally took the English test i need to get my application package for the UK....it was an interesting experience...especially the verbal part....its like an interview with the examiner, i spent 15 mins talking about foood....it was pretty random..but im glad its over....2 weeks until i get my results and i can hopefully start the actual paper work soon...cuz the plan for the UK doesnt seem real until i actually start the paperwork ....im gettin excited..cant wait to go

finally a day off...ive been sick since i came back from Montreal over the weekend and havent had a chance to sit down to recover cuz ive been at work every day since.....

Montreal was alright, it was cold and rainy when we went and the 6 hr drive is wayyy too long...i dont have the patience to sit in the care for that long...i have a short attention span and it gets so boring in the car...on top of that...since it was just us driving...i felt bad for sleeping and making him drive alone by himself...so i didnt sleep the whole way ....the wedding was beautiful and everything was in French....i sat through a 2 hr mass only understanding bits and pieces....but i did go for some poutine...i was expecting some crazy awesomeness since Montreal is the origin place of poutine...but i was disappointed...not what i had expected...i actually think poutine here is better....but i think my Montreal weekend made me gain like 10 pounds..all i did was eat bad food...but it was all soo good and soo worth it....

back to Toronto and straight back to work...i cant wait till these two months are over.....i usually like to keep my personal life private at work but it seems that lately everyone seems to know my personal business....its like Greys minus the hot doctors...but really im just annoyed of this and ready to never see them again.....

Im still alive

Its been a week since ive gotten my eyes done...YAYYY...im not blind...thats a good sign....its actually been a really good experience so far...no pain and ive been fortunate enough to not have experienced a lot of the side effects....im so glad i can finally see...its the strangest feeling....when my eye gets dry now, i still have the urge to want to take out my contact even though i have none....its going to take some getting used to but im going for my 1 week follow up tomorrow....then hopefully i can finally rub my eye...cuz its been driving me crazy......

and i got some pretty awesome goggles out of this....HA....ritee....but much better than i expected....

getting lasik done last week made me miss some exciting stuff that happened over the weekend...i had to miss out on birthdays and weddings...and from those...some Grey's Anatomyish drama....this makes work much more interesting.....

this is communitychannel's new video...its hilarious...shes so funny...

Lasik Tomorrow!

On the eve of my lasik procedure...i am quite excited....tired as hell from work but super excited....i hope everything goes well tomorrow and i will get to go through with the procedure as planned....had a nice day at work and we got cookies....yes its the little things that make my day at the hospital....cookies and candy are definitely awesome.....and today is also the last day i would have to work with him again...its actually really good but now that hes gone i have to work with his other half..... i cant wait until they're both gone....but i dont think that will be until july when the new year of residents come through.....it would be nice not to see them in my face constantly at work....but i think ive gotten used to it by now.....

Im at work on break and I can't sleep...I'm lyig here with my touch with my music blasting to drown out the snoring...2.5 hrs left until I can finally go home and go to sleep... I was to my friend today about life and relationships ...I think I'm going through my quarter life crisis... Recently everthing seems confusing to me ..I'm not sure about anything in my life and I feel like my plans to leave is a good way for me to figure out everything cuz I don't really feel like I can figure it out here. Cuz everything is the same ....I just new a different environment by myself to sort things through...I feel like it's slfish of me to leave everything and everyone behind but I think I need this for my own sanity... I feel like ever since school ends these feelings of confusion have gotten worse...can't wait to start all the paperwork ...I kind of wished I could leave now instead of waiting until the end of the year...it just seems so far away

KIck Ass

so i had to watch Kick Ass yesterday...yes HAD to....since it was the bfs turn to pick a movie, i had to go watch Kick Ass....it was a waste of 2 hrs of my life that ill never get back.....i went into this movie thinking it was suppose to be a comedy...mostly cuz McLuvin threw me off...but it was not funny and quite frankly way to too long for my liking....im not sure why this movie got 4 stars in the paper...it was kinda lame and stupid...

off to work tonight in a couple of hours....ew....hope its not as busy as the other night...not the biggest fan of working nights anymore...i used to love it but now it just throws off my circadian rhythm....and also the hospital at night kinda freaks me out...ive heard too many stories....on fri, my friends and i were hearing this strange squeaking noise the whole time we were on break......not cool....anyways...4 more days until Lasik...YAY

I really like this song, Wongfu produced it, i love their work and its such a sweet song....wouldnt it be great if love was as idealistic as it was in movies....and if it was so easy to say that it doesnt matter how the relationship ended but the experience you had....even though thats the truth, its harder said than done......

decided i need a vacation, even though i said im on a budget and going to save up for london next year...i cant stay here until then...too long without a vacation..so im gona use my aeroplan points......free flight, yay!

Buffalo FAIL

went to Buffalo yesterday to shop...since our dollar is at par, we thought we would go shopping....its strange how everything here is soo expensive compared to the US...its crazy how much cheaper things are down there...so i had hopes of going down to do some major haulage of clothes and came back with a disappointing lot....my total amount purchased was less than 10 items for myself...BOoo o well, it wasnt meant to be....yes i apply that theory even to shopping.....

despite my disappoint, i did stumble upon this adorable Badgley Mischka bag at the outlet for saks....i love it, its a really cute crossbody bag, white leader with gold hardware....the best part is...it was only $90 ...it made my day, even though i didnt get a chance to buy as much as i would have liked....i never knew it was so hard to find an affordable handbag that doesnt look cheap...i was on the hunt for an affordable bag and it has never been so difficult to find a bag...i must admit that i am picky when it comes to handbags because thats my thing...some people are shoe people and im just a bag kinda girl....its the only aspect of fashion that i truly believe in designer...dont get me wrong, i love designer clothes and shoes too but i also do not have unlimited access to funding, so realistically, as much as i would love to be dipped in designer its just not possible right now....so normally handbags are the only area where i really like to save and splurge....but considering my current status with all these unexpected costs with the Lasik and all....getting another designer bag was out of the question, but I had thrown out my only crappy everyday bag so i needed a replacement...and im glad that i finally found one...cuz this search was going 8 months strong.....i did feel a sense of accomplishment...haha

i was also hoping to find some shoes to buy....however, that didnt happen yesterday, so i went online and ordered a bunch today ....its off of a site i saw in my loulou shopping magazine...the shoes were like dirt cheap, i dont expect great quality, im really only getting it for the trends of the season....trends come and go so quickly, which is why i usually go cheap on trendy things...i got 5 pairs of shoes for under $80......its crazy how affordable the site is....i hope they dont break as soon as i wear them...that would not be cool...cant wait till i get them :)

continuing my gossip girl marathon....i never knew it was so hard to catch up on a whole season....school has put me behind on so many shows....at least its something to do while everyone else is at work...

Reunion!

Its been a while since ive been out with my work friends....with everyone being busy with school, leaves and exams....its about time we had our reunion....ive been looking forward to this past weekend it was sooo fun....so nice to hang out with everyone again....








Buffalo tomorrow for some quality shopping time :)
o how awesome it is when our dollar is at par....

Ever since i finished school last week, its been really busy...it feels like ive been at work everyday....i think i have in one way or another...it just seems like theres been a lot going on...but im finally off today for 2 days then im back to work again...it feels like i havent worked this much since I started school....

so since I booked my Lasik procedure, ive had to book a lot of other appointments for both pre and post op...so my days off are filled with alot of eye appointments it seems...but im so excited...16 more days to go until the surgery...YAY!...it seems a little weird to be so excited for surgery but i am....




watched Vicky Christina Barcelona this past weekend, i borrowed the movie from my friend like months ago but never had time to get around to it with school and all...so i made the bf watch the movie with me...haha he hated it and im undecided...it was an interesting movie, definitely different....i liked the message the movie is trying to portray, but it was kinda boring at the same time....it really does make you think about love and what is a good choice, i guess what we're all looking for is a little different and everyone has their own perspectives...im not sure which perspective is more me...Vicky was the character that didnt really take risks with love and stayed safe...with the "cookie cutter" relationships and stayed with someone that she knew was crazy about her...she said she loved him...but wasnt "in love " with him...i can see that being true for many relationships...how people can love their partners but not necessarily be in love with them...so in the end...whats better?...to love your partner or to be in love with them?...what's the difference? i guess the movie was kinda philosophical....im not sure which type of love everyone is striving for.....can we be in a relationship that posses both or are they mutually exclusive?.....so many questions but none of which i know the answer to....perhaps this is why i need to go find myself...figure out what i really want out of everything in life, not just my career....

Freedom!!!

So i finally finished my last day of class yesterday...yay!!! survived the mini poster presentation conference....and now i just have to wait for the official invitation for convocation....but its alll DONEEEEE......2 years of my life and im finally done....now what?!?...im going to have so much time on my hands now...considering ive decided to not go back to full time...its just too gross...i prefer to stay part time so i dont burnout.....

went to my 2nd consultation today for lasik...and ive made my decision about which center i want to go with...emailed the patient consultation lady, hopefully ill get the date i want for the surgery....i hope it gets done sooner than later....im actually really excited for it.....

Last day of Clinical

my last day was bitter sweet...as much as I want to finish school and move on ....its sad to leave my placement...its become part of my routine for the past few months...i think i might actually miss my placement, it was a really good placement......but at the same time, im so glad im one step closer to being done....

one more day left...i cant wait till 6pm tomorrow when its all over...o sweet freedom....sooo closssse

the raptors made me sad yesterday when they lost....so close...sigh...good effort Bosh

NCAA finals tonight...who would have thought that id actually care and know whos in the finals....i swear...the bf makes me watch too much sports....and i hope Duke wins...

SUNNn

It has been such a warm long weekend..usually we have to wait until May 24 weekend and pray that its a nice long weekend, but this year, this Easter long weekend has been beautiful....we've hit 25 degrees....YAY :)

finally got myself out to the range to hit a few balls....its so fun ....wats a better stress reliever than to wack a club at a ball....who ever thought of this was genius....off to the Raptors game....they better win...

2 more days until freedom ....o my...im getting a little excited....i finally finished off my poster and printed it at Kinkos...the damage- $135....its stupid that i have to pay to do my homework, on top of paying for my tuition...but im just so glad that im almost done that it didnt even hurt that i paid 135 for a big ass piece of colored paper....

Consulted

Had another day off yesterday....went downtown to get my grad pictures done for school and then i went to my first lasik consultation....yay! so it turns out im a candidate for lasik, i still have one more consultation to go to next week to compare what they have to say....hopefully ill have my procedure booked and done by may....thats what im aiming for......its going to be expensive but im not sure what other option i have if i cant wear contacts anymore.....i have so many unopened pairs of contacts that i have no idea what to do with anymore.....

have to finish my project for clinical today as my last day is tomorrow....sooo excited, i cannot wait until next tues for the poster presentation....then its all done and im finally freeeeeee....

today is suppose to be 16!! and we're suppose to hit 25 by fri...thats crazy, we didnt even see 25 degrees last summer, mind you it was a oddly cold summer last year.... 25 in april is pretty strange but i dont think anyone's complaining...afterall, we lack sun and warmth in Toronto, its about time we all get some vitamin D :)

One more week

survived another weekend at work..so this will be my 2nd weekend in a row that i worked......trying to get rid of my last weekend...working 3 weekends in a row is lame.....it was actually a decent weekend, my friends were on and as busy as it was, it was fun...and it was actually not so weird working with him this weekend.....since im getting closer to the end of school, everyone's been asking what i want to do next....i guess being asked this question so often lately made me really think about what i want...the answer is that i really dont know...when i was younger, i really thought that id have it all figured out by now...but now im on the verge of 25 and i still dont really have a clear idea of what i really want...marriage, kids?!?...yes i guess eventually but definitely not right now....i feel like i still dont know what i want and at this moment, the thought of marriage and kids makes me think of settling...not that settling is a negative thing, its just that it means a lot of responsibilities...for some reason i tend to associate all that with starting to get into a routine where all you do is work, pay a mortgage and try to balance a life between work and kids.....right now, that just seems scary....but whats scarier is that im almost 25 and feel so clueless....this is perhaps the biggest reason i want to leave for a while, i need to go "find myself", as cheesy as it sounds, i think i really need some time to myself, to remove myself from my current routine and really figure out what my next steps are because I feel like im getting a little too old to not know....im getting to the age when people expect you to settle down, perhaps this is me rebelling against societal standards of their expectations of me....ive never gone through a stage of rebellion when i was younger, to think of it...maybe im slow and this is my rebellion...haha or perhaps im going through my quarter life crisis....i wonder if this is just me or other people experience this too...cuz it seems like everyone around me is getting engaged and settling....

True love?

When I opened my safari today, a story popped up from yahoo about a stork.....
its such a sweet story, the male stork visits his injured mate in Croatia every year from South Africa...the female stork was shot through its wings by hunters and hasnt been able to fly since, so shes being cared for in Croatia by a farmer...every year for the last 5 years since the incident, the male stork has come back every year for mating season.....after their babies hatch, the male stork would teach them how to fly because she cant, then they will all make the journey to South Africa when the young are strong enough to fly...

i think this story is so cute...such devotion is so sweet ...

Uncalled for...

working in a hospital....ive encountered and met people during the hardest times in their times....which means that I often meet people when they're not themselves and are rude and unreasonable....dealing with patients in these situations is one thing, however their families are often the most difficult aspect to handle.....families of patients can sometimes be just straight up irrational and unreasonable....as much as we try to emphasize with their situation many are just unreasonable...their demands are often never based on logic and their behaviors are consumed by their emotions, all of which all health care providers are well aware of....

but yesterday, i think i have met the worst of all pts families that ive encountered thus far...we deal with a lot of "difficult" families, but she was something else....this 87 year old lady was so mean and condescending, it was basically verbal abuse....not only did she call all the nurses idiotic and al the residents stupid, she goes on to make this remark after speaking to one of the female residents...."i dont want to speak to her, i want to speak to a male doctor. Women doctors should not be doctors, they should be at home raising kids..." .....um...right, what century do we live in? I mean i understand shes from a different generation, but how can a woman say something so degrading.... whats more interesting is how hypocritical she is...apparently she used to help her husband run the nursing home they own, but every other woman should be at home raising kids...of course, on top of all her horrible comments about how incompetent our staff is, she makes ridiculous demands on all these tests her 91 year old husband should be put through.....then she goes on to threaten to never make a donation to the hospital again cuz we're all idiots....nothing annoys me more than when rich people think that they can use that as a threat to get their way....some of them feel that they're entitled to "special treatment" just because they regularly make donations to the hospital....its great that u are contributing to the advancement of hospitals and science...but im not sure why u think health care providers should treat you any differently.....that would be unethical ...sometimes patients are demanding enough, but throw in the fact that they're loaded, sometimes they become monsters....im not trying to generalize and say that all rich patients are like that but some can be ...and its so annoying.....

i hope this lady is gone by the time i go back to work next weekend.....on a brighter note...im off for 2 days :)

crazy weather

It was 18 degrees yesterday outside..18!... and now its snowing....wtf......seriously?....im so sad i miss the sun already.....
i realized it has almost been 4 months since ive been able to wear my contacts....its crazy...i dont remember what its like anymore....i cant wait till my first consultation for lasik...cuz this glasses business is ridiculous, its so inconvenient at work....it actually grosses me out......one more week until my consultation, hopefully i'll be suitable for lasik......

watched Zombieland yesterday...its actually a decent movie....i thought it looked so stupid when it came out but its actually quite entertaining....




time for some homework .....2 more weeks until freedom :)

Day Off

i had an unexpected day off today, i was suppose to go into clinical today, however found out that my preceptor wasnt feeling well and didnt go to work.....basically i trucked all the way there for nothing, o well, hope shes alright...so i had a day off...something i totally needed...im still not recovered from vegas yet in that im dead tired....i need to catch up on sleep but hadnt had a chance to with school and work...on top of that i managed to get mon off as well...sWEeet! no work...otherwise i would have had a total of 3 days off in 2 weeks in between school, clinical and work....days off = homework...so its just means that i dont physically have to be somewhere else...

3 more weeks until the end of my program...YAY!...i am so excited for the end...i can almost see the light!

its 17 degrees outside today...crazy! it was 17 degrees last summer...and its only march...but apparently its suppose to snow next week....one more storm before its spring.....im so excited for warm weather...

this was suppose to be my purchase from Vegas...but a stupid scratch on the bag ruined my purchase...and i wasnt able to find the color anywhere other than the balenciaga store....its so beautiful...


cant even order it online because it only accepts amercian credit cards,,,if only i lived in the states...i think i'd be broke..but happy broke...everything is so much more accessible and cheaper

Home

Came back from Vegas last night...and im already sad...i was starting to get sad when i knew it was our last day....sigh...
coming back to all the stresses of life just makes me sad...back to the grind....
our flight was suppose to leave at 1245pm Vegas time, but there was something wrong with one of the wheels?!...we ended up being stuck on the plane for 2 hrs before we were finally able to take off...
i dont mind plane rides...but i hate it when we're grounded and just sitting there breathing recycled air...yea not a big fan...
we finally got home at 10pm...2 hours late, i was hungry and soooo sleepy....and i had to wake up to go to school today....thank goodness my class is at 1 cuz i would not be able to wake up early....
the weather was nice today at home too...17 degrees ..sweet...i could get used to this...
but i wish i was still chilling by the pool..

i miss vegas :(

Almost Vegas time!

1 day away from Vegas!! yay!! im in dire need of some warm sunlight...
Im ready to get a tan...well my version of a tan, which is probably unnoticeable to other people...
even though i fly out tomorrow, i still have so much work to do for school before i leave....
but im excited to chill for the weekend :)

Also started looking at lasik centres....booked 2 consultation appointments ...im not really sure where to go...
its hard to determine which clinics are reputable...they're all big chain clinics, but really, how am i suppose to know whose actually decent....
im nervous about these consultations, im not sure if ill be eligible for the procedure...i hope so but this dry eyes business apparently may make me not suitable....but its never been a chronic issue as it has been for a recent issue.....
hope it goes well because im really looking forward to not having to wear glasses again....i miss my contacts...but i really dont think my eyes have necessarily made any improvements since the last time i put in contacts....sigh.....and i hope its not ridiculously expensive....cuz thats going to put a damper in my savings for moving to london......

It feels like Spring!

i think its like 5 degrees outside today...it feels like spring! as much as I love snow, its not fun when i dont get to go snowboarding on it....i went a whole season without hitting the slopes...its so sad..my weekends consist of either going to work or doing homework...yes i live a pretty uneventful life...its sad that all i do is work, clinical and homework......i havent really gone out with my friends since new years....im in active hibernation and i cant wait till im done with all of this and I can finally go out....

trying to finish up my abstract for the poster presentation...i hate word limits and 300 word limit is brutal...i feel like i cant write anything down...so lame...



i love this montage of the "I Believe" song from the Olympics...a song that everyone initially thought was a pretty corny song in the beginning turned out to be the most downloaded song in Canada on itunes during the Olympics...its so catchy...i love it!

been working a lot lately...well not A LOT by normal standards but a lot for me and combined with clinical...its almost as much as normal standards...i finished clinical for the week but still have 2 more days at work to go this weekend...not really looking forward to it since I had such a busy day on Wed....but working with him again hasnt been so bad...better than the first time around...I think id still prefer to not if I had a choice....anyways ...1 more week till Vegas!

I was watching TLC's Say Yes to the Dress...im not sure why but i like watching this show...im a big reality show junkie but I usually just stick to MTV shows....not the most informative or stimulating channel but i feel like TV is downtime and I should be able to watch watever trashiness that entertains me...and i love my MTV...back to TLC...so on this particular episode, this bride was telling her story of how she met her fiance and basically "their story"....usually people on the show have pretty cute stories ....but she met him while they were both on vacation and I guess they fell in love at first sight..so on and so forth..the interesting thing was that she later found out after the trip that he was actually engaged...obviously he dumped his ex fiance after that and got with her..and now 8 months later they're engaged....is it just me or is that a little weird....im not sure thats a "how we met" story i would want to tell my kids...i found it a little disturbing on the note that the guy actually hit on another girl while he had a fiance at home and well he eventually ditched her too...personally, i think this new fiance is brave, i dont think i would be able to trust someone like that...her reasoning for his behavior was that he realized something was missing from his last relationship and it was her...um..right...if he made that mistake once...technically, cant it happen again? i guess it just wasnt meant to be with the first fiance...

HE SHOOTS...HE SCORES!!

Canada for the Gold!!...
best way to end the Olympics...we couldnt have asked for a better ending than a GOLD in hockey...an amazing game and i think i got palpitations from watching the game...i have never been so anxious watching sports before...but im so proud we beat the US..afterall...it is our game they're playing...

The olympics were great...we beat the record for the most gold medals won ever during the games....thats freakin awesome!! but the closing ceremony was a little lame...i was embarassed to watch it...all those Canadian sterotypes were horrible and not even funny...and i cant believe we couldnt get bigger acts for the ceremony...o well...all in all it was a great 2.5 weeks...wish i could have been in Vancouver ...

today was the first day of the new teams and hes back...wasnt as weird...we'll see how it goes..

YAY for Team Canada and BOO to tax season

Last night's hockey game was huge for Canada....we beat Russia 7-3 in an awesome blowout game...who knew it was going to be such a high scoring game, with the majority of the goals in 1st and 2nd period...YAYY...2 games down...1 more to go to the finals...i was actually at the Raptor's game last nite but couldnt really concentrate on the game with people in the box seats behind me randomly cheering and yelling because they were watching the hockey game...I ended up turning around and watching both games at once...the fact the Raptors werent playing well didnt help either...the crowd cheered louder for the hockey scores when it was posted than they did during the game....

finally have a day off to hang out and do nothing...no homework...NOTHING...except its tax season...and I have to go buy RSPs...when it comes to my personal finances...i know its horrible but i think im retarded...i just dont understand...going to buy my 1st RSP contribution last year..i have never felt so stupid in my life when the lady was trying to explain all the different options to me....and I have to go again today...i cant wait :S for some strange reason, I just dont understand investing concepts and stuff..with my bf being an accountant...it doenst help because he nags me about investing and such..everytime he tries to explain it to me...it ends up in him just getting frustrated with me cuz i dont understand...i know i should be more financially responsible and learn but every time i try to read about businessy stuff...it makes me sleepy and its sooo boring ...i am looking forward to feeling like an absolute idiot in the afternoon...

Women's Hockey tonight for the GOLD!!

O Canada!

Sunday's hockey game was a total disappointment..im pretty sure a lot of Canadian hearts were broken that night....sigh....o well...what can you do...Miller was on fire and quite frankly...we werent so hot....so now its a long 4 straight wins to get to the gold....it'll be pretty amazing if we can pull through that....Germany tonight...last I saw...6-1 :)

we picked up 2 more golds ..yay!
Even though our overall medal count is half of the highest (United STates), in terms of gold medals, we're actually only down by 1...interesting...

Attended a workshop today addressing the issue of working with people of different generations...it was interesting to see how all our upbringings and different major social events can greatly affect our perspectives and behaviour at work....for every generation, they have common traits and beliefs ...it was interesting to see how these affect how we interact with one another at work...and of course, i was the only one from Gen Y (10-29 yrs old)...and everyone had something negative to say about my generation....I had to sit there and defend my generation...but i think their opinions mostly stem from misconceptions and how my generation is portrayed by the media...Apparently Gen Y people are the "bubble wrapped generation"...meaning that we were spoon fed by our parents and grew up in a protected environment created by our parents...of course, none of this applies to everyone and many other factors come into play, but I think they are generalizing to most middle class famiilies....

it was an informative workshop, i think everyone should have the opportunity to experience it to assess our own biases and misconceptions about our co workers from different generations...
im sure everyone's experienced something negative due to misunderstandings from generation gaps....If i had a nickel every time a patient asked me if I was 12...

GO TEAM CANADA!!

Through all the madness and craziness of school and work...i cant help but procrastinate with the olympics ...
after all it is in Vancouver....kind of wish i could be there right now...
wanted to get the Canadian sweater but its all sold out :(
but at least i got some mittens :)



i think the Olympics have definitely brought this country together cuz normally Canadians are necessarily known for our patriotism ...i think it tends to overshadowed by our neighbours to the south....
but this time...its different...the games are at home and its definitely time to bring it out ....
although our medal counts are never overly impressive, its still a great time to honor all our athletes as they work much harder than athletes in other countries that have great support systems in to develop their athletes....
Canadian athletes have to work and train , while most athletes in other countries simply just train because training is their job...
the fact that Cdn athletes are as successful as they is simply amazing...i cant imagine holding down a job and training for the Olympics at the same time...
i wish we had a better system in place to support our athletes because people are quick to judge medal counts, however we often fail to look deeper and understand why such a big country like Canada just cant seem to rack in the medals like our neighbours....

but regardless, theres not a better time to be Canadian :)

tonight...Mens Hockey- Canada VS United States....o its gona be good....

My last paper of grad school...for now

Writing my last paper for grad school....yay!!...
im so excited but also dreading it at the same time...
i think ive already kinda kicked into vacay mode...but its a little too early....
but i have to finish this paper today cuz the bf has tickets to the basketball game tomorrow...
plus its superbowl sunday....yay!?!?...not really but i promised i would watch it with him......
my eyes are still always so dry....im puttin in natural tears eye drops like my 80 year old patients :(
still havent been able to put in my contacts...sigh...im gona give it another week before i go to my optometrist...
ive already been to my family doc twice....



i love this song, usually not a big fan of HK pop but this girl is really good....
she does a cover of Alicia Keys' Falling and she was pretty damn good....and shes only 18...crazy

50/50

I was listening to the radio the other day and it seems that....
Many research studies show that the success rate of marriages in today's society is a little more than 50%...
i think the rate was something along the lines of 60% compared to 40% ending in divorce....
with such a high rate in divorce nowadays, i cant help but wonder why it is like this....
many people of the older generation often comment that our generation is different...
its sad that we all hold this belief that marriage is forever, but when reality almost half of those walking down the aisle end up in divorce...
these studies totally ruin our idealistic image of marriage and what it signifies....
but what makes our generation different when many of us still continue to hold this idealistic image of marriage....
i mean i doubt anyone walks down the aisle thinking in the back of their mind that they might end up divorced some day....
it makes me wonder if it is just how our society has evolved that so many of us will end up divorced....or are there other factors that leads to such high rates of divorce...
perhaps divorce rates were lower back in the day because it just wasnt feasible.....
it was socially unacceptable to talk about divorce and many women were not financially able to even think about the concept..
many women in the past were unable to support themselves financially, so the thought of divorce would be absurd ..
however, with the times changing and the status of women and men becoming more equal...women nowadays dont have to be trapped in a relationship that doesnt work....we're more financially independent in today's society...

i wonder how it would have been if women in the past were as financially independent as women are in today's society....
how would that affect their divorce rates??
perhaps its not our generation thats so different, maybe the older generation just wasnt given the means to have the option to choose like we do now...
and really...a divorce doenst necessarily signify failure...not everything works out...sometimes things are meant to happen a certain way.....certain things just arent meant to be....

homework makes me sleepy

Home today, its so nice to have a day off...
we got some snow last night...soo pretty and peaceful....
ive been so busy with work and school lately...
next week is going to be brutal...i either have work, school or clinical everyday...7 days in a row....
disgusting...

sigh...i just need to make it through these last few months before im free....
looks like i wont be able to go to europe for a while....
to get my license in the UK, i need to take an English proficiency test...weird...i mean afterall, we do speak English here too...but its mandatory for all foreigners....
and we cant get the paperwork start until we get the results for our tests..but we dont have time to take the test until MAy....
so i guess leaving in fall may be pushed back a bit....
apparently this English test is a 8hr long test....gad...seriously? my license exam was 8 hrs....
damn the UK is so hardcore....8 hr test on English...
it would be pretty sad if we failed....haha?!? :S

back to my lit review...o joy....

One down, 3 more to go

Its FEB!! yay!...
3 more months of school left...im getting so excited and yet anxious all at the same time.....
but i have something to look foward to in march, vegas is booked :)
cant wait to go see the new hotels at citycentre.....they opened up a miu miu :)

so my eyes have been horrible lately, i havent been able to wear contacts since christmas....
working those 4 nights totally ruined my eyes.....its been so dry and red lately...
a whole month...this is the longest time ive ever worn classes since i was 14.....
its so frustrating and my prescription for my glasses arent even up to date.....
i cant even see far....sigh....

I hate u expedia...

Finally booked our Vegas trip..
what was suppose to be a happy time was ruined by expedia....
the day after we booked our flight (within 24 hrs) they dropped the flight prices by 200 each...
so we call expedia to try to get it changed....apparently they dont do price adjustments and cancellations are only within the day..
we booked our flight at 1130pm at night...so we had 30 mins to cancel with no charge?...LAME...
we called the airline and apparently they offer 24 hrs free cancellations...interesting....
but Expedia said they dont have that policy and theres nothing they can do...
after an hour on the phone telling us this and that...and giving us conflicting information..we were finally told there was nothing they can do....
stupid expedia...ripped us off 400 dollars.....

Humanity....

The earthquake in Haiti has taken precedence on most news channels and coverage on this has been extensive....
it is disheartening to see the images and videos that are surfacing from the country....
the reports and articles of the amount of suffering in the country is unimaginable....
recently, I was listening to the radio to my favorite morning show, the DJs were appalled by a letter they received...
someone actually emailed them complaining about why the government was increasing the amount of troops we were sending to Haiti to help with the relief....
he said that he felt bad for the people but didnt understand why everyone was making such a big deal and why all these relief efforts were made....
i was honestly surprised that people like that still exist...the lack of empathy is a little sickening...
he basically said that its not in our country so its not our problem....
its crazy how someone can have a mentality like that...
would you walk away from a dying person on the street?...im thinking most likely not...so how can one turn their back to other human beings when they help the most...
i dont understand where this guy was coming from....but thank God, theres many that arent like him...
the government is matching donations on a site for Haiti...
plancanada.ca ....made my donation, may not be millions but every little bit helps....

on a personal note...
finally told the bf that i want to go to europe for travel nursing....
it was a lot harder than I thought it would be...but he understands...
ive been really afraid of how he'll react, but he surprisingly took it better than i thought..
of course hes not happy about it...but he's accepting of it....
telling him took so much of out me emtionally...couldnt sleep all night...only got like 1-2 hrs....
went to clinical today, and on top of everything i run into the one person i really didnt want to see...
ran into him twice today...wat the hell..wat are the odds of that...
i think ive decided that i wouldnt mind never seeing him again...never imagined i would want that....
but its easier that way.....

Finding Mr Right

I am exhausted after 3 days of clinical...
im not meant to get up early every day...this new routine is hard...
im used to my weird random scheudules of work...

but for the last few days, ive been watching Oprah when i come home...
weird...cuz usually im not s fan...
today she was talking to some single 40 something year old woman about finding love...
this woman was nuts...she had a specific list of criteria she wanted in her future spouse...
the list was like 15+ items...and she wonders why shes still single...
basically Oprah told her she was nuts and needs to change her way and stop interviewing for a husband on dates...
she was supposedly setting herself up for failure because no one out there exists with all those qualities...
sometimes I wonder if thats true, if our expectations are too high...are we simply just setting ourselves up for failure?
I think that it is a little crazy when people actually have lists of what they're looking for...
it just seems a little extreme....and even if you find someone that matches all those qualities...
does that necessary guarantee that there will be chemistry and it'll work out?
Im dont think so ...what you think you want may not be what you need....
plus i believe that love/relationships seem to always come when you least expect it...
perhaps these relationships work out because you were caught off guard and thus didnt have any expectations...
You cant be disappointed if you have no expectations....
plus this way, you can actually get to know the person ....not dismiss them if they dont posses all the traits we all look for in our idea of the "perfect" significant other.....

Sometimes...just cuz they're perfect on paper, doesnt mean they're perfect for you....
ive had to learn that the hard way....it makes the process of moving on that much harder...
cuz your perception of the person is that they were your IDEAL, but in reality...your ideal may not necessary fit into your life and work out the way we all hope....

Engagements are the new Black

Lately, it seems that every week or so...someone i know gets engaged...
its like its the newest and lastest craze....
everyones picking up a fiance here and there.....
people i know are getting engaged left right and centre....
its a little crazy....or maybe im just getting to that "marriage" age....*shudder...
dont get me wrong, i believe in marriage and would love to get married someday...
but the thought of getting married now....seriously scares the crap out of me....
i just dont think im ready to "settle down" and be responsible.....
i dont think ive had enough time to figure things out for myself yet...
i feel that i need to do this first before i would ever be able to commit to anything as serious as marriage...
all this constant engagement talk has been wondering when i be ready...
personally, i think im too young to be engaged....perhaps im a year or two...
so i guess for now....ill just be uncool and not join in this new fad that everyone else seems to be on board with...

VEGASSS

Oh Vegas...
must you taunt me....so this is my second attempt to plan a trip to the city of sins...
the first time for nye was a complete failure...
but hopefully this time will work out for march....
actually i think im going to go regardless...ill make the bf go with me on a random weekend...
I am in need of a vacay...im experiencing the winter blues....
i see snow but havent gone boarding...i just feel the crazy cold...( -20 C is not fun)
on top of everything....i think the shopping gods have heard my cries....

MIU MIU has opened its 7th american store in Vegas!!! o SWEET.....
Miu Miu is my favorite designer label for handbags...i just absolutely love this brand, almost as much as i love Marc JAcobs...
But Miu Miu seems to be so hard to access in North America...its so rare, perhaps this is why i love it more...
Although Ive always thought I should venture out into other labels...i have yet to find bags that I absolutely adore like i do MIu MIu.....
Ive never been a big fan of the LVs or the Guccis.....im not sure why...im an odd child......
I think its because it seems everyone loves it...and im not a big fan of logos all over my bags either....
so ever since i started working a real job 2 years ago...Ive decided i deserved a designer bag/ year...
and every time Miu Miu has captured my heart.....and each with its own story too :)
Since Canada is a sad sad land for designer labels...ive been deprived of access to gorgeous designer labels here at home....
Ive had to gone on vacation every time for a bag...its actually a good thing ...twice the amount of excitment...
Perhaps my goal should be to buy a designer handbag from every big trip i take...(Miu Miu 1& 2 were from Rome &Paris)

so i hope this vegas trip works out cuz i need a new bag...

Ignorance is bliss

Sometimes I think that not knowing is better...
as naive as it sounds...
what you dont know cant hurt you...
sometimes i prefer that i didnt know ...its just easier that way....

A New Year, A New Decade...

Happy New Year!!
So its 2010, the beginning of a new decade, this year marks the end of another chapter of my life...
so i have high hopes for this new year and new decade....
I graduate this year from grad school, this marks the end of another chapter...
im ready to move on from medicine and decided that im going to try something that I want to do, as opposed to doing something that is expected of me...
the limits that societal norms places on our lives are limiting and although it seems irresponsible to defy these standards...
i think i need to do something for myself because at the end of the day.....its my life...
why should i care what people think...even though its easier said than done...
society places too many expectations on everyone and by conforming to societal norms, we often strip ourselves from the luxury of living our life the way we really want to .......
so after graduation this year....
i really want to just travel...not get a new job based on my new credentials and settle down ...
im not ready to grow up and be responsible...
i havent truly figured out what i want to do with my life yet....ive put off this travelling thing before to be "responsible" and get a job and go back to school...
i think i just need some time for me...to figure out what I want from life...




watched 500 days of Summer....
I loved it...put some recent events in my life into perspective and reminded me that i need to let things go ....
even though we all have ideas of what our "ideal" partner would be ...sometimes these ideals just arent right for us....
some things just arent meant to be...and I have to learn to deal with it and move on ......
I need to learn to cherish whats in front of me...as opposed to holding on to an idealized memory of what was....